Fatwa: # 17179
Category: Marriage
Country: Canada
Date: 12th October 2008

Title

I am a new convert to Islam, just over a month and I have a question regarding my relationship and soon to be marriage....So my question is is it ok under these circumstances for me to marry this wonderful man?

Question

This requires an explanation so I apologize in advance for the length.
I am a new convert to Islam, just over a month and I have a question regarding my relationship and soon to be marriage.

First I will explain. I come from the USA. My parents moved to Canada when I was 17 and left me to fend for myself. After 6 months my mother contacted me to let me know that she had met a man that she thought I would get along with. I decided by some inspiration to go to canada and meet him. I did and we fell in love and I had to come back to the states. I didnt know if I should be with him or what to do so like with everything I asked God. I basically threw my hands in the air and said you decide.
The next day I was kicked out of the place I was living and was forced to move to canada.
I stayed with my parents untill my mom started becoming abusive again and I didnt know how to handle it. Again I asked God You do it!
I called Josh to have a friendly ear and he told me if things got bad I could stay with him. There was a couch I could sleep on. Again "God, you do it." I was kicked out less than an hour later and went to stay with Josh.

I want to add also that this methode of asking God for help every time we have had a problem has always brought us closer together. Just a few months ago we were discussing the idea of separating because of his family and again I asked God. Well next day we were fine. No more resentment, and it went so far as the next time I saw his family they were as apologetic as a people who dont say sorry can be. They were warm and forgiving and made us feel really alot better.

Well long story short we have been together, been living together for five years and it has been a great relationship. don't get me wrong we have our ups and downs all couples do but whats important is we work together, we never fight, we respect each other and we talk everything through.
Well here is the thing. I converted and he is happy with that because I am happy and hes on board with me raising our children Muslim Inshallah we have them.
He is not religiouse nor is he interested in having one. He belives in God, the prophets and judgment day, basically everything I belive in but he doesnt want to label himself. He is a good charitable man, and treats me and others extreamly well.

But we have been talking more about marriage. We were talking about it before I converted but now it has become more of a prioraty on his insistance for me to practice my faith right.

I want to know if under these circumstances and obviouse signs from Allah if it is ok that we marry? I know it will cause problems in alot of eyes, but seeing as the blessings we have recived and the obviouse assistance from Allah I cant see this as being wrong.

So my question is is it ok under these circumstances for me to marry this wonderful man?

Answer

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh

We pray and make dua that Allah keep you steadfast in Islam, Aameen.

A Muslim female may marry only a Muslim male. It is not permissible female to marry a non-Muslim male, even though he claims to believe in Allah and the Last Day and he does some virtuous deeds. In order for a person to be a Muslim, he has to believe in the basic beliefs of Islam. That includes in the finality of the prophet-hood of Rasulullah (salallahu alayhi wasallam). The person in reference does have some Islamic beliefs. Encourage him to formally accept Islam You could seek the assistance of an Aalim/Imam (Muslim scholar) in encouraging the person to formally accept Islam. If he has any questions, the Aalim/Imam could answer him and try to satisfy his conscience.

And Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Wassalam

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa

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